What has happened since Arnold Schwarzenegger fathered a love child
I need to write about something very important; the fireplace project.
The fireplace is almost done and it will be the focal point of our living room; i.e. the boobs.
This is how I picture the reveal happening.
***close your eye when you read this***
I’ll invite a few friends over under the guise that I want to “catch up”. They’ll be a pot of coffee on, maybe some finger foods…soft music…avant-garde electronic; no jazz.
They’ll arrive conveniently at the same time. I’ll be wearing skinny jeans, a tight t-shirt and dark underwear; my hair two weeks post cut.
A mug of coffee gently rests in my right hand as I open the door “please come in and have a seat, we just finished the fireplace”. (I gesture towards the fireplace, feigning disinterest but knowingly belittling them with our superior life/fireplace.)
(Loooooong Paaauuuussseee)...I shed a tear.
That’s how it’s done.
As I mentioned previously, there’s no chimney, so the fireplace vents out the side of the house. But, a “fake” chimney soffit was handcrafted to emulate a chimney. I could cry I'm so smart.
Marble and stuff.....
Mantel coming together right now, in sweet harmony.
The fireplace is almost done and it will be the focal point of our living room; i.e. the boobs.
This is how I picture the reveal happening.
***close your eye when you read this***
I’ll invite a few friends over under the guise that I want to “catch up”. They’ll be a pot of coffee on, maybe some finger foods…soft music…avant-garde electronic; no jazz.
They’ll arrive conveniently at the same time. I’ll be wearing skinny jeans, a tight t-shirt and dark underwear; my hair two weeks post cut.
A mug of coffee gently rests in my right hand as I open the door “please come in and have a seat, we just finished the fireplace”. (I gesture towards the fireplace, feigning disinterest but knowingly belittling them with our superior life/fireplace.)
(Loooooong Paaauuuussseee)...I shed a tear.
That’s how it’s done.
As I mentioned previously, there’s no chimney, so the fireplace vents out the side of the house. But, a “fake” chimney soffit was handcrafted to emulate a chimney. I could cry I'm so smart.
Comments