UnPeaceful Camp

Two weekends ago we all went to Peace Camp. Um, what the “F”?

Each year this Buddhist temple, which I am a member, holds a camp for kids in Michigan. It’s called “Peace Camp”. Isn’t it obvious from this blog that I would be a member of a Buddhist temple and take the kids to Peace Camp?

You can read about it here so I won’t go into details:  www.buddhistpeacecamp.org

Parents and kids from around the country and a group of high school kids from Korea attended.

Everything started badly. When we arrived on Friday, it was raining and the kids were all around crankly from the car ride. While Anna entertained the girls, Xavier “helped” me put up the tent.

The same people who made school buildings in China made our tent. I had my suspicions when we bought a $144 tent that sleeps eight people. Anyone who has purchased a tent knows that when it says, “sleeps eight,” it means sleeps eight Pygmies lying side by side with no space between them while Deep Forest plays on the stereo.

I really wanted a big tent and my last tent was stolen when I left it in Wisconsin nine years ago while intoxicated camping. Has anyone seen it? It is gray with a maroon cover.

Our eight-person tent was completely unstable. I ended up having to secure the posts to all the surrounding trees with string. String I tell you! I told the kids to pretend like we were visiting a Syrian refugee camp.

Ok, with the tent up we headed to the main outdoor space for dinner.

Dinner is a bunch of picnic tables under and pavilion, a vegetarian buffet line, and an assortment of random bowl and plates.

Everyone must be quiet in the buffet line and silent for the first five minutes of the meal. Then, a bell rings and you can start gossiping about people. Needless to say, I think we were the only family with kids that would not stop talking. Then, they started fighting. Xavier was the instigator. Anna took him back to the tent and while everyone was still silent we all heard her yell, “I am so sick of your behavior!!”  (crickets)

Can you have your child’s vocal chords snipped?

That night, the kids would not go to sleep. They horsed around forever 21. I could have peacefully murdered them.  

Things got a lot better the next day and I don’t have the energy to tell you about much. They swam, hiked, had a camp fire, etc. On the last night the front of the tent collapse. Joy. Our phones also ran out of batteries so I don’t have any picture.

Boy does this blog entry suck